Many are suspicious that Intelligent Design proponents are nothing more than creationist apologists in disguise. But God didn't do it. It was an advanced race of aliens. See, God is only one being, so he could not have possibly created himself. Whereas aliens were a race that evolved, by natural selection, from inorganic molecules. their technology become so advanced that they were able to travel back in time and initiate the big bang.
After our solar system had formed, they then devised advanced extra-dimensional machinery that allowed them to billions of years ago form organic Earth molecules. They have been covertly manipulating the DNA in our dimension ever since. Their technology is so advanced they they were able to reach in and design the mutations that created bacterial flagellum and dinosaur feathers.
But the real strange part of the story is that they are indeed here on Earth, living among us as members of the Discovery Institute. They had planned on giving a big reveal to the world but felt that Darwinists needed to first be dealt with in order to set the stage for an amenable public reception. However there were some slight setbacks in Dover where their clone of Judge Jones began to malfunction, thus thwarting their plans to kidnap the real justice and remove him into an extra dimension.
But despite Behe's controversial status, they are still 100% behind him and will continue to support him via wired money transfers of undisclosed sums into an off-dimension account.
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